Thursday, June 9, 2011

Strength of a Man & Beauty of a Woman!!!!!!!!

Strength of a Man

The strength of a man isn't seen in the width of his shoulders.
It is seen in the width of his arms that encircle you.


The strength of a man isn't in the deep tone of his voice.
It is in the gentle words he whispers.


The strength of a man isn't how many buddies he has.
It is how good a buddy he is with his kids.


The strength of a man isn't in how respected he is at work.
It is in how respected he is at home.


The strength of a man isn't in how hard he hits.
It is in how tender he touches.


The strength of a man isn't how many women he's Loved by.
It is in can he be true to one woman.


The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift.
It is in the burdens he can understand and overcome.





Beauty of a Woman


The beauty of a woman
Is not in the clothes she wears,
The figure she carries,
Or the way she combs her hair.


The beauty of a woman
Must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.


The beauty of a woman
Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman
Is reflected in her soul.


It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows,
The beauty of a woman
With passing years-only grows.


Lucky is the man who is the first love of a woman,
but luckier is the woman who is the last love of a man


1min. Question Paper..........



Scroll Down for Answer...


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Monday, January 24, 2011

Laugh a while......LADIES SPECIAL(guys have to read it)



Laugh a while......LADIES SPECIAL(guys have to read it)

*Thought 1*

When we are born, our mothers get the compliments and the flowers.
When we are married, our brides get the presents and the publicity.
When we die, our widows get the life insurance.
What do women want to be liberated from? *


*Thought 2*

The average man's life consists of:
Twenty years of having his mother ask him where he is going,
Forty years of having his wife ask the same question;
and at the end, the mourners wondering too.*

*Thought 3*

A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, 'If you
take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.' The
man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was
astonished.

He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the
voice shouted, 'Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run
over you, and you will die.' The man did as he was instructed, just as a car
came careening around the corner, barely missing him.

The man asked. 'Who are you?' 'I am your guardian angel,' the voice
answered. 'Oh, yeah?' the man asked 'And where the hell were you when I got
married?'

This is the best!!!*


*Thought 4*

Everyone in the wedding ceremony was watching the radiant bride as her
father escorted her down the aisle to give away to the groom. They reached
the altar and the waiting groom ; the bride kissed herfather and placed
something in his hand. Everyone in the room was wondering what was given to
the father by the bride.

The father could feel the suspense in the air and all eyes were on him to
divulge the secret and say something. So he announced 'Ladies and Gentlemen
today is the luckiest day of my life..' Then he raised his hands with what
his daughter gave him and continued, 'My daughter finally, finally returned
my credit card to me.'

The whole audience including priest started laughing....

...... But not the poor groom!!!!







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How To Manually Remove a Virus from Your Computer

if you are tired of sitting and waiting for your anti-virus software to remove the new virus infection, the steps below are for you. No programming skills are required! Just a basic knowledge of commandprompt syntax will do...for this demo, the virus is on the portable USB drive (e:\virus) named virus.vbs





1. Create a back-up. Safety comes above all else. Save your files on removable storage or on another partition aside from the Windows drive.



2. Run the Windows command prompt. You can run the Windows command prompt by either clicking on the Start Menu\All programs\Accessories\Command Prompt or by pressing Windows + R on the keyboard and typing "CMD."



3. Look for the directory or folder where the virus resides. Go to the folder where the virus is hiding. Its usually resides on the Windows temporaryfolder or on the Windows system folder. Check partitions and drives for viruses, e.g. type "cd e:\virus"



4. Show the hidden virus and remove its attributes. It will be easier if you can see the virus. Remove the virus attributes, which are read only, archive, system file, and hidden file. e.g. type "attrib -r -a -s -h virus.vbs"



5. Delete the virus. Say goodbye to the virus by deleting it, e.g. type "del virus.vbs"

20 Funny Quotes

20 Funny Quotes

If all is not lost, where is it?

Funny, I don’t remember being absent minded.

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip round the sun.

It’s not hard to meet expenses…they’re everywhere.

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

If you’re living on the edge, make sure you’re wearing your seat belt.

If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you’re in the bathroom.

Old programmers never die. They just terminate and stay resident.

Nostalgia isn’t what is used to be.

It was all so different before everything changed.

The first rule of holes: If you are in one, stopdigging.

I went to school to become a wit, only got halfway through.

I started out with nothing…I still have most of it.

If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.

Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

A will is a dead giveaway.

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

Bad spellers of the world untie.

Funny Matrimonial ads

Funny Matrimonial ads



SOFTWARE ENGINEERS:
Wanted a Girl with a Lovely Look & Feel, Good GUI with Security features(privileges only for the Specific User especially critical Functionalities) .
There must not be any Critical or Medium Bug in her. Low Bugs can be deferred But needs to B fixed by the Next Build.

She must _NOT_ be PLATFORM INDEPENDENT or USER FRIENDLY.

We are ready to Test the Application & CERTIFY the product but we will assure it will never be released to ANY OTHER Customer.


DOCTOR:
Recently a love-bug injected in me a strange bacteria, making me desirous of marriage. I'm looking for a girl who is patient and has knowledge of all ills and pills, is religious minded and keeps away from all sins be it anasin, metasin or crosin. I promise to be a good doctor with no side effects. Apply or reply.


BEGGAR:
Allah ke naam pe koi ek biwi de de, Doosre ki nahi to apni hi de de, Allah tujhe ek ke badle do dega, Hillary hogi to Monika bhi dega

What Happens wen u upgrade Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0

What Happens wen u upgrade Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0

> Dear Tech Support Team:
>
> Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0 .
>
>
> I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes
> that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
> In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
> monitors all other system activities.
>
>
> Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket 5.0 , BeerWithBuddies
> 7.5, and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever
> selected. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while
> attempting to run my favorite applications.
>
>
> I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the 'uninstall '
> doesn't work on Wife 1.0.
>
>
> Please help!
>
>
> Thanks,
> "A Troubled User "
>
>
>
> REPLY:
>
>
>
> Dear Troubled User:
>
>
> This is a very common problem that people complain about.
>
>
> Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
> is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.
> Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
> EVERYTHING !!!
>
>
> It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend
> 5.0.
>
>
> It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the
> system once installed.
>
>
> You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not
> to allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony-
> Child Support) ..
>
>
> I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the
> environment.
>
>
> I suggest installing the background application " Yes Dear" to
> alleviate software augmentation.
>
>
> The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because
> ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the
> system will return to normal anyway.
>
>
> Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.
> Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep
> 3.0, Cook 1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use
> these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program
> NagNag 9.5 .
>
>
> Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0
> is to purchase additional software. I recommend
> Sarees 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0
>
>
> STATUTORY WARNING : DO NOT, under any circumstances, install
> SecretaryWithShortS kirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife
> 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
>
>
> Best of luck,
> Tech Support....